Today is International Women’s Day. Tonight, I’m co-ordinating an event in honor of the Unify Global Sisterhood. On this day, all over the world, women will gather together to connect, meditate and heal, which will have a massive impact on the energy of our planet.
Things are changing. Like I wrote about in my last post, I can feel it in my bones.
To say my life has changed since becoming single would be a severe understatement.
But while the external circumstances of my life have certainly played a role in the transformation I am experiencing, it’s the internal seismic shifts which have directed it all.
Three months ago (to the day) I told the truth. I told the truth my body and mind and heart had been screaming at me for months but which I had been terrified of admitting to myself.
I told the truth about just about one thing, which at the time happened to be, “I’m not going.”
This small statement marked a massive turning point for me. It chipped through the egg-shell of denial I had built around my heart and allowed it to beat again.
The relief was sensate. I felt like I could take a full breath.
The thing about honoring one truth is that it opens up a space for more truth to find you.
This is what happened for me. The truth rushed in to carry me and I swear in my whole life I’ve never felt so guided by Grace.
Being able to act from love instead of fear made the breakup an extremely healing experience for me.
It stripped away lifetimes of karmic cycles in it’s wake.
Basically, I told the truth and chose me (my desires, my needs, my inner calling) over someone else for the first time in my life.
This has resulted in me learning the greatest lesson of my life:
If I do not honor myself, I simply cannot honor anyone else, and I certainly cannot expect them to honor me.
It all begins with me.
In the weeks and months which have followed that day, I have literally felt my life force returning to me. The energy I put into bypassing the truth was draining me more than I ever realised.
My friends have been looking at me, mouths agape and eyes wide, saying, “You look…. really GOOD.”
And rather than swatting away their comments, I say thank you and tell them that I feel GOOD.
I share my story with them about the inner lessons I am learning and many of them can relate to not honoring themselves fully.
This journey of radical self honoring (because it is a radical concept for most women) is something I practice every day.
Just last night, I had dinner plans with wonderful friends. Friends I love. But as evening fell and the wind howled outside and my eyes felt heavy, I knew I did not want to go. Once upon a time I would completely bypassed this feeling because there were plans to keep and people to please.
But I just can’t do that anymore.
I sent my apologies with love, unplugged my phone and played Krishna Das on loud while I made myself dinner, chanting “Om Navah Shivaya,” in honor of the Hindu celebration of Shiva.
It may seem like a small thing, but this is really huge for me. I have never been taught this stuff, so I am fumbling through, with only my beating heart as my guide.
Turns out, that is all the guidance I ever needed.
Today is also a New Moon in Pisces, and a solar eclipse. I’m not an astrologer but I’ve been taking an interest and feeling more connected than ever to the Universe around me.
Because the truth is that I am a part of it. As a woman, I am deeply connected to the cycles of the moon and planets. When you consider the concept of e-motion as ‘energy in motion,’ it’s no wonder we often feel overwhelmed by our feelings, and yet, we have been taught to suppress rather than honor them.
I’ve had the opportunity to practice radical Self-honoring a LOT. I’ve nurtured myself through sickness, cleared my calendar on days when my energy was low and have started saying ‘no’ more times than I say ‘yes’, none of which is second nature to me.
Now, the times I say ‘yes’ are fully aligned with the truth of my soul which makes life vastly more fulfilling.
The paradox of all this is that I know I am here to live a life of service to others, particularly women. But in order to do that, I must, must, must, begin with me first. I must fill my cup so that it may naturally overrun, rather than trying to give what I do not have myself.
‘Pushing through’ has been my default setting my entire life and I have suffered a lot from that way of living.
I’ve also let go of projects that I’ve poured hundreds of hours into because they no longer feel like a fit, which brings me to another important lesson:
Just because you are committed to something doesn’t mean you cannot change course.
In fact, if you don’t follow the call of your heart, the thing you are committed to will simply not flourish the way something you are fully aligned with, will.
On this journey of Self-honoring, I know in my heart that we must support each other, rather than judge. I am keenly aware of the blessed life I’ve been given, and also aware of the responsibility I have to help others as a natural result of that.
So no matter what your circumstances are on this day, know that you are part of a Global Sisterhood who are gathering today in your honor. Your struggles are not for nought. As my beautiful sister Holly says, You Matter.
We are all in this together, attempting to heal ourselves so that we may may heal humanity.
The time has come for women to realize the creative, healing power within them, so that we restore the Earth to balance and live in harmony once more.
It all begins with us.
Happy International Women’s Day and New Moon, sisters. Please share this message with the women in your life.