I’ve recently gone back to work. I’m not talking about my blog or my guide or my shop, even though I have been doing a little work on those too. I mean, the real work, my actual job which is the sort of work which doesn’t look that great on a CV or garner too many likes in a Facebook news feed.
For me, it’s spiritual work, and it looks nothing like I imagined ‘spiritual work’ to look like.
I’m not saving babies or tending to the sick.
Actually, I just realised that I am in some ways, only I am the sick baby!
I’m going ‘back to the start’ with the program of recovery I work, well, sometimes work. And it’s hard.
It’s hard to look at myself and see what attitudes are holding me back and causing me pain. It’s hard to see how I contribute to every ‘problem’ in my life and sometimes conjure them up out of nowhere.
It’s hard to see how selfish I really am and at the same time acknowledge I am infinitely loved and forgiven.
It’s hard to slow down, to once again throw my hands up and say, “I don’t know how to do this, help!”
But I’m doing it, because despite what the world or my ego tries to tell me about the sort of work which will make me happy, I know this is the real stuff. On a good day, I catch a glimpse of truth that this work is my only true purpose in life, but I usually very quickly push that to the side because I would much prefer my only true purpose to be writing best selling books and gathering awards for humanitarian work.
That would look so much cooler.
This work isn’t cool, it doesn’t make me look good and it isn’t celebrated.
Which is exactly why I need to do it.
So I just wanted to give a ‘shout out’ to all the unglamourous workers among us. Those who are on their knees praying for help, trying to get through the day after the loss of a loved one or changing a dirty nappy (diaper). To those who are attempting to not get angry today, trying to find a way through their depression, gathering the courage to go to their first recovery meeting or caring for a sick family member.
It’s not glamourous work. It won’t win you any awards or make you any money. But it’s the real work.
It’s the work which brings true peace to the world, starting with our own hearts, and in that way, it should be the most celebrated work we do.
So I better get back to it…
Hmm, maybe I’ll work on the bed.