Living like the Kardashians
|September 4, 2013||Filed under A Year In Playa del Carmen, Mexico, Sweet Stays|
You know how I said my sister’s visit was bittersweet? Well, it’s time to cover the sweet. I planned to book Holly in for a luxury stay for the first few days of her visit and had narrowed the search down to a couple of places when Condo Hotels Playa del Carmen invited us to stay in three of their luxurious properties over the course of five nights. I was ecstatic to treat my sister to some Kardashian-worthy digs, since I had recently lured her to the dark side of reality television viewing.
You see,when I visited her in Vegas, I revealed my love for the show ‘Keeping Up With the Kardashians’ (and of course the spin off shows ‘Khloe and Lamar’ and ‘Kourtney and Kim Take New York’, but that goes without saying…). She was nothing short of horrified by my tacky taste in television before launching into every single thing she found annoying about the spoiled, shallow family.
“Give them a chance,” I told her, indignant. “Yes, Kourtney speaks rather slowly but I actually admire her calmness while she raises two kids in the face of Scott’s playboy behaviour , and yes, Kris cries like, all the time, but she is the glue that holds that family together…” and on, and on…
Feel free to judge me, but everyone needs their vice, and watching an Armenian/American family who are famous for being famous is a not-very-guilty pleasure of mine. It’s my one hour of zone-out time per week, which Tyrhone refers to as ‘my show’, knowing that he doesn’t get to ask me for anything during ‘my show’, which, I might add he takes quite an interest in himself.
After I returned home, I received a facebook message from Holly which read, Bruce is going deaf and Rob is depressed because of his weight and… on and on. She was hooked.
I can’t believe you got me into this, she ended the message with.
You’re welcome, I wanted to reply, but instead I just smiled a sinister smile like I would imagine an evil cult leader to make when he recruits a new follower.
The Chamberlains take Playa del Carmen
So when we showed Holly to her suite at the Maya Villa, our first stop on the ‘Chamberlains Take Playa del Carmen’ tour, she was as excited as Kim Kardashian at a Botox party (almost).
Kim’s, ahem, Holly’s room overlooked a tropical garden and a green tiled Jacuzzi which I took great pride in revealing was actually the ‘head’ of the gecko-shaped pool, complete with mozaic-tiled feet.
It was, as the K-dash girls would say, “SO CUTE!”
Next stop was the El Taj, which has become a home-away-from-home for me of late, at least I like to think of it as such. Our two night stay consisted of pretty much hauling ourselves from the pool, to the Jacuzzi to the beach and back to the pool… Yep, it was pretty tough…
Then juust as we were getting bored of all the luxury, it was time to move to our final destination, the Porto Playa. The doorman led us to our PENTHOUSE overlooking the cascading, two-level pool and we thought we’d died and gone to reality TV star heaven.
My curiosity lead me up another staircase above our apartment, and only then did I discover our own private roof terrace complete with an outdoor kitchen, Jacuzzi, sun lounges and a thatched palapa.
“Shut the front door!” I said to Tyrhone and Holly as I stood at the glass doors of the apartment, panting from scurrying down the stairs to reveal my news (which was kind of ironic, since they wouldn’t be able to hear me if they did shut the front door).
“We’ve got our own terrace with a SPA!” I said, which, looking back was very un-Kardashian like, and all too Chamberlain like, making me realize that living the high life is only fun when you don’t get to do it very often. It makes it more exciting.
I actually feel a little sorry for those poor Kardashian girls who live like this all the time and probably forget to appreciate it.
Kinda, but not really.
*Our stay was provided by Condo Hotels Playa del Carmen, because… we’re that awesome